Ugly Baby

I’m not one of those people who thinks babies are really cute.  They always seem a little gross to me with their hazed over eyes and dry patchy skin, exuding waste from every orifice.  It was pointed out to me by a friend that babies actually kind of look and behave a lot like larva, squirming about unknowingly.  At least larva can sustain themselves…or can they?  I’m gonna look that up.  BRB.

According to Wikipedia: “Animals in the larval stage will consume food to fuel their transition into the adult form.” and “Larva is Latin for ghost”  Larva is Latin for ghost?  That’s beside the point but very interesting.   So larva, unlike babies, do take care of themselves until they transform into adults.  

We respond to certain unattractive behavior with the expression “Stop acting like a baby.”  There must be some truth then that babies are sort of annoying or we wouldn’t say that.  Maybe it’s more true of other people’s babies.   I’ve watched people get annoyed with babies that are brought out into public and I myself have been annoyed with babies if I have to sit too close to a screaming one or witness a diaper change.  Not everyone feels this way about babies.  Maybe you are one of those people who loves babies.  Anne Geddes has made an entire career out of photographing them, as seen below.  Even really well lit in beautifully poetic context and sleeping peacefully, I still don’t want to look at that ugly baby.

I do, however, look at and am fond of every single cat I see.  Maybe I wouldn’t be so afraid of having and caring for a baby if in the larva stage they looked like kittens.  I would like to think a cute little kitten is growing inside of me.  I wouldn’t even mind holding it when it came out it even if it was all covered in gunk if it were just a cute little innocent kitten.

I do think kids are super cute.  When I tell you I think your kid is super cute, I really mean it. But if I say “I think your baby is so cute” I am probably lying.  Believe me, I feel bad about it.  I wish I thought your baby was cute, I promise.

I still want one some day, though.  So now I’m wondering…am I a bad person if I don’t think my own baby is cute?  Or will I think my baby is cute no matter what it looks like because it’s, well, my baby?  If I ever have a really ugly baby and I hold it up to you with love and pride and say, “Look how cute my baby is” please lie to me.  This is one of those times where I think a little white lie does more good than harm 🙂

Be silly. Have Fun.  Post baby pics if you have them!  I’ll ask my mom to send me one of mine and I’ll post it here

Love and light,

Hollywood

 

 

 

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